Gay Elliott McFarland-Scarborough dies at 59

By CLAUDIA FELDMAN
Copyright 2005 Houston Chronicle
Gay Elliott McFarland-Scarborough, a local writer whoworked for the Houston Post and the Houston Chronicle and was an advocate for the mentally ill, died Friday. She was 59.
"She was durn-near perfect," says her mother, Glenna Elliott, "but she didn't have a very easy adult life."
Popular with newspaper readers, she wrote a syndicated column, HomeFocus, and worked for such varied institutions as Quilts Inc., Memorial Hermann Hospital, University of Texas Medical School at Houston, the UT Health Science Center at Houston and the Mental Health Association of Houston.
While she was working in the field of mental health, she wrote a brochure on postpartum depression that has been distributed throughout the state and translated into Spanish. It will be translated into Vietnamese.
McFarland-Scarborough's personal life was more challenging. After an early marriage that ended in divorce, she found happiness with writer John Scarborough in 1979. Three years into their marriage, he died of heart disease, and she was left to raise their infant son, Slade. His ongoing challenges with Asperger Syndrome, a developmental disorder related to autism, made her a fierce advocate for all those touched by the disorder.
In 1990, McFarland-Scarborough discovered she had Stage 4 breast cancer, and she battled multiple cancers on and off for 15 years.Toward the end, she asked for a little help from her friends because she could no longer juggle her demanding cancer treatments and Slade's everyday needs.
A group of 30 friends, representing all the stages ofMcFarland-Scarborough's professional life, became known as Gay's Angels. Along with her family, they helped her with problems big and small. What she didn't understand, friend and colleague Pam Lewis said, was that Gay helped the volunteers more than they helped her.
Another devoted ally was Sister Alice Potts, an 81-year-old nun whom McFarland-Scarborough had profiled early in her journalism career. After the story was published, the two remained friends, and at the end of McFarland-Scarborough's life, Potts checked on her daily.
"She was such a phenomenal person, such a gifted person," Potts said."Oh my, it was hard to see her with cancer that was out of control."
McFarland-Scarborough was born July 14, 1946, in Alexandria, La. She and her family moved to Houston in 1949, and she attended public schools. She graduated from the University of Houston in 1968, worked at the Post for the next 10 years, then got her master's degree from the creative writing program at UH.
From 1979 on she worked at a variety of jobs, starting with the Chronicle, then Quilts Inc., then assignments in the medical center.
In 2000, she came to the Mental Health Association.
"She was a person who understood how hard things can be for people,"said friend and MHA colleague Leslie Gerber. "For her, advocacy was a heart-felt mission, not just a job."
McFarland-Scarborough is survived by her son; her parents, Glenna and Quenton Elliott Sr.; brother and sister-in-law, Quenton Jr. and Meg; and many other relatives and friends.
Arrangements for a memorial service are pending.